Goal Weight 2 and TICK :)

And I got there (just :) !)

Week 7 Weight: 69.9kgs
Week 7 Loss: 0.5kgs

Total Weight Loss: 8.1kgs
BMI: 23.6

TINY weightloss, but enough to get me to goal weight 2. So scared of gaining that ANY loss will do. (At this rate I'll be skinny by December 28th lol)

Got cake shoved into my hand at a work party today and FML I ate it:( SO SO SO SO SO SO SO STUPID!!! DICKHEAD LOSER FATTY HOPELESS PIG but have all weekend free to work it off. Changing jobs on Monday so will have more time after work and I WILL start exercising. Less physically demanding job so will definitely need to.

Sorry for all the capitals in this post lol
-I am the only difference between FAT and FIT- xoxo

Mid Week Post

So I'm still 2 days off weighine myself but just thought I'd leave a note about today. I got home from a friend's house today and my little sister says "where have you been?" "Lauren's" i reply, "did you eat?" she asks. "yes, why?" I lie. "you look really skinny." she said.

Even though I know I'm still hugely fat, it was the best thing anyone has said to me in weeks. Still waiting for someone to ask me that big question :) "Have you lost weight?" but I will remember that conversation forever. No one who doesn't know I've been dieting has commented yet but it just drives me harder towards my goal. 2 days away with work this week where I ate 3 meals a day so I'm petrified about weighing in this week. And I drank alcohol!!! Didn't binge when I drank which I usually do but I didn't vomit either so I figure all of those calories are floating around in me somewhere:(

Also went to the movies this week with my sister and we were sharing a drink, I didn't eat but she had popcorn and I was paranoid about contracting the calories off the can. I get anxious all the time, feel on the border of panic attacks, but I can rationalise myself out of it. It's usually when I'm alone. I feel so alone all the time now! Used all my Internet in 2 days looking at thinspiration :|

So my refrained goals:
Goal Weight 1: 75kgs   -   DONE!
Goal Weight 2: 70kgs   -   Hopefully this week!!! :)
Goal Weight 3: 65kgs
Goal Weight 4: 60kgs   -   Must be this or lower when I go to Europe in August
Goal Weight 5: 55kgs
Ultimate Goal Weight: 52kgs, BMI 17.6

If I post on Friday, it's probably good. If not, it's horrible:(

I'd never tell anyone because then they'd think, why aren't you thin then?

Great Week!

What a great week! Was so excited when I weighed myself this morning...

Week 6 Weight: 70.4kgs
Week 6 Loss: 3.2kgs

Total Weight Loss: 7.6kgs
So close to my 2nd goal weight now! And got a hot boy's number today. Still fat and a long way too go but progress is progress and I'm thrilled as long as the numbers keep going down. Hope so badly that I'm below 70kg next week but are going away with work so will have to see how many meals I can miss without getting noticed.

So just to add, I work at a very physical job and ride horses in my spare time so don't do any exercises at the moment, will probably start push ups/sit ups soon to tone up. I've been living on an up and go for breakfast (chocolate of course:) ) just because I find I get faint otherwise, something small and healthy for lunch, and only drink diet drinks or water. After a month I stopped feeling hungry all the time and now my body is using up all of its still plentiful fat.

Wasn't even hungry at lunch today but ate some salad anyway, my stomach went nuts grumbling - it now complains when I DO eat lol...

I'm 172cms tall and my BMI is currently 23.8.

Have changed my ultimate goal weight after looking into BMI's, would now like to be 52kgs. Yeah I know that's a 26kg loss but I'm a determined bitch ;p

Hope to have good news next week:) xoxo

Week 5...and a few days:)

Went away for three days this week. Couldn't get out of eating three meals a day. Knew I'd gain weight but nearly died when I saw it was 0.9kgs!!! The numbers are only supposed to go down not up. Was so angry, sad, humiliated, devestated it took me three days to get up the courage to post this. This week WILL be better though. Didn't eat a single thing yesterday and so proud. Good kickstart and wanted to weigh myself straight away but held back. Kind of ironically I don't want to obsess too much:)

So my stats this week:

Week 5 Weight: 73.6kgs
Week 5 Loss: -0.9kg

Total Weight Loss: 4.4kgs

So a few questions?
Have had really bad headaches lately, solutions? Panadol, laying down, drinking fluid doesn't work.
Been feeling like fainting, miracle cure anyone? :) especially to hide it when at work

Until next week when I lose all this weeks gain plus more:), the less you eat, the less you weigh. xoxo

Week 4 and Still Going...

So my stats this week:

Week 4 Weight: 72.7kgs
Week 4 Loss: 2.1kg

Total Weight Loss: 5.3kgs
Yay! I was so worried this week, will wavered once this week around dessert time. But so happy with this week's loss:)

Please feel free to comment, add advice. I need all the motivation I can get.
Until next week...